Isn’t it strange how something that you once were part of continue to go forward even after you no longer part of it? This thought just hit me last week when I realized that schools were starting again after the summer break. That all the people taking the bus to go to school, just as I had for the past three years. It’s a really bizarre feeling, but also a bit bittersweet.Continue Reading
Archives for August 2017
Being truly invisible you could anything you wanted, no one would know where you were or even who you were. I loved actually love to be invisible, the right way. Then I would have a good reason why people never seems to listen to me, or noticing my presence. But as it is now I’m just a part of the background, some kind of white noise no one seem to listen to. I hate it, some days I feel like scream just so someone would notice me.
There has been times when I’ve literally been standing next to someone a good 10 minutes and they still jumps into the air all the sudden when they finally notices me, and I’ve been talking to them the whole time…
It could have something to do with me being somewhat shy, but how come other shy people get remember and I don’t? I hate being in this situation, as an extrovert it’s a nightmare. I want to hang out with people and be social, but it’s hard when no one seems to notice or care about me. This leads to a long journey down the whole “Why can’t I just be different?”. Never a good thing to start thinking about 1 am as you need to sleep but ends up crying instead since you just tore yourself to pieces.
What is it with me that makes me so easy to forget? That makes me so easy to just ignore?
Sometimes it really feels like a part of the shadows, or just a low hum background sound no one cares about.
What makes the whole thing worse is that my sister is there as a constant thorn in the side. She doesn’t even want friends yet she’s the one who got them, who get’s invited to events and never is forgotten.
Have you ever experienced anything like this? How did you make yourself get more attention?
A word is just a word, something you put together with other words to form a sentence, or to shout to exaggerate your feelings towards something or someone. But words have meanings, some a deeper than others. And this is something I stumbled across at the beginning of this year.Continue Reading
Why me? Why does it always seems to happen to me? Some times I truly feel as if I’m cursed.
How can this many bad things happen to a person, again and again?
What could I possible have done to deserve this treatment?
My whole life has always been the same, I’m alone and the only thing I wish for is friendship.
But I never seem to get it, and it has always been like that.Continue Reading
One of my absolute favorite colors are pastell-y yellow. I’m big on pastel colors in general but just something with that soft yellow that pleases my eyes just a little extra. So for years I’ve been searched for a pastel yellow nail polish but has always come up empty handed, until now. But why? You would think that it would be a common color, especially in summer lines. But apparently not. So you can believe my happiness when I finally found one from Essie that exactly matched the shade I wanted, and I immediately did order it. Continue Reading